OK, I respect everyone who works in the food services industry. I really do. It is a thankless industry, one filled with long hours, low pay and having to be bossed around by 18-year-old pimple-faced managers who hide their insecurities by belittling their employees so that they can feel important.
But this story just has to be told.
This morning, I went down to Del Taco to get my usual breakfast fare: A macho bacon-and-egg burrito with extra bacon and extra cheese...
(by the way, I used to order this burrito so often in college that when I would walk in, the workers would literally say: "Hey Nev. The usual?")
Anyways, so I order the Nevin special and the woman charges me $4.50. I hand the lady a $20 bill...
...and she hands me $15 change.
Now, I'm a wiz at basic math. Have been since I was a kid. So I knew right away that I was owed 50 additional cents. And getting this 50 cents was important to me because I need quarters to do the laundry. People who live in apartments know exactly where I'm coming from.
"Excuse me," I said to the lady. "I believe you owe me 50 more cents."
She came to me. I showed her the receipt.
She looked back at me. No response.
"As you can see," I tried again, pointing at the receipt, "you charged me $4.50 and I gave you a $20. 20 minus 4.50 = 15.50. You only gave me $15. You owe me 50 cents."
And then I showed her the three $5 bills she had already given me.
She stared back at me.
"I gave you $15," she said.
"Right!! Right!!" I replied, emboldened by the fact that we were now making progress. "And now, you just owe me 50 more cents."
Long pause.
"No," she said. "I gave you $15 change."
We were now back to square 1.
"But if you would just look at the receipt, which has no reason to lie to you," I said, "you could clearly see that I am still owed 50 cents."
No reply.
"It's simple math."
No response.
"Just type the numbers into the cash register, and it will do the figuring for you!!"
Nothing.
Now, at this point you might be asking yourself: "Nev, why didn't you just let it go? It's only 50 cents." But I had already come this far. And I've got laundry piling up, damn it!!
"Lady," I said, exasperated, you owe me 50 cents. Please give me my quarters."
"Uh, I think I'd better get the manager," she said.
My God. Are you fuckin' serious? We actually have to get the boss to get me my correct change?
Luckily, the manager quickly caught on. I showed him the receipt, the three $5s and he quickly understood that I was due more change.
So he reached into the cash register...
...and handed me five dimes.
Laundry machines don't take dimes.
"Um, excuse me," I said, "can I get quarters instead?"
"Sorry sir," the manager said, "we're out of quarters."
Figures.
Next time, I'm going to Carl's Jr. for my breakfast needs.
They serve burgers for breakfast.
And...they have quarters.
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And now, I'd like to introduce a new weekly blog feature entitled:
SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE
In this segment, we mention things that make it clear that our way of life, as we know it, is over.
In this week's SOTA:
I was at work the other day and walked by a female co-worker who was at her computer.
"What's going on?" I asked her.
Her reply:
"I'm ordering English muffins online."
Wow.
Do you like these blogs? Hate them? Somewhere in the middle? Leave me a comment and let me know. Your words keep me motivated...to write mine. :-)
---------------
Hey, guess what? I'm trying to make a living writing blogs about the dumb things of everyday life. How am I doing this? With the help of the folks at iBizTraining.com, an online training resource that shows you how to run your own online business (Online Training, Online Business. My God, it fits!!). Find out more at www.iBiztraining.com
The best sportswriters in the world are women (I have always said this). And the best in the world is none other than my girlfriend Ramona Shelburne, sports columnist for the Los Angeles Daily News. Read more about her at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ramona_Shelburne
There's a high standard in today's fashion world. And no one meets that standard better than Spooles, which provides customers with high-quality purses and other accessories that are both affordable and trendy. Get trendy!! Go to www.spooles.com
There's a cowgirl inside every woman: Elusive, passionate, untamed (I wrote that myself!!). Elusive Cowgirl caters to the free spirit within you, priding themselves on a special line of high-quality products unique on its own yet tailored to fit your everyday style. Find your inner cowgirl: Visit www.elusivecowgirl.com
The laziest man in Earth…is blogging about it. Go to www.lazyhank.com and find out more.
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