Saturday, March 22, 2008

Conversations With Mom: A Nevin Barich Blog Experience

Moms are nuts. We all know this. Yes, they're kind and sweet and the most wonderful women on Earth -- and if nothing else, you can always go home to Mom -- but I'm sure I speak for many when I say the most random, ridiculous conversations we will ever have in our lives are with the woman who gave us life.

Over the past few months, I've had a few rather exceptionally whacked-out conversations with my mom, who -- being from Brooklyn and Jewish -- is more nuts than most.



Nev's Mom: Nevin, I'm not so sure about this Content Editor job.

Nev: Well like I said, Mom, I'm just talking with them. No formal offer has been made.

Nev's Mom: I know, but with Wonder Bread going out of business...

Nev: I know but...wait, what?

Nev's Mom: You didn't hear? Wonder Bread is going out of business.

Nev: Um...OK.

Nev's Mom: Nevin, hello? Wonder Bread!

Nev: What does Wonder Bread have to do with my job search?

Nev's Mom: Well, if Wonder Bread can go out of business, don't you think this company you're talking to can go out of business too?

Nev: That...that makes absolutely no sense!! Mom, the Content Editor job deals with loyalty services. That's, like, credit card rewards points. Wonder Bread deals with...bread.

Nev's Mom: I'm just saying: It's a scary time in the business world. If Wonder Bread goes out of business, then that makes me worry more about you.

Nev: But I don' with bread.

Nev's Mom: But you eat sandwiches!!


Nev's Mom: Who is your Internet provider?

Nev: AT&T.

Nev's Mom: Why don't you have Verizon?

Nev: Because AT&T was the main provider in my coverage area.

Nev's Mom: But isn't Verizon your cell service?

Nev: Yeah.

Nev's Mom: So why isn't Verizon your Internet provider?

Nev: Um...I don't know.

Nev's Mom: Well, wouldn't that make more sense?

Nev: Mom, when I moved into my apartment, they told me AT&T was the main Internet provider here. So I got AT&T.

Nev's Mom: Did you at least consider Verizon?

Nev: Why are you asking me this two years later?

Nev's Mom: Because I'm concerned.

Nev: About what? My Internet?

Nev's Mom: Yes!

Nev: Why?

Nev's Mom: Because Verizon is your cell phone. And you have two different technologies and two different companies and...I just worry!! What if they don't work well together and they explode?!?


And finally:

Nev's Mom: Don't forget to get your brake pads done.

Nev: Mom, I don't have to do that for, like, 3-4 months.

Nev's Mom: I know, but I'm just reminding you.

Nev: You're reminding me about something I won't do for four months?

Nev's Mom: Well, what if you forget?

Nev: Well, if you're so worried, why don't you remind me in, like, four months?

Nev's Mom: Well, why don't you write yourself a note so I don't have to remind you four months in advance?!?


My favorite line was the "technologies not working together and exploding" thing. I confess: I didn't see that one coming. That was a new one.



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