Remember when I wrote this?
I'm going to tell you something that I've held inside for years and have never said until now:
I hate the Beatles.
Yeah, that's right. I said it. In fact, I'm gonna say it again.
I hate the Beatles.
Man, that feels good!! A weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I'm a straight man, so this is the closest I think I'll get to coming out of the closet.
I mean, their songs suck, their haircuts were dorky and THEY WERE BRITISH!!!
Where's your American pride?
Plus, the band members were morons. John Lennon broke up the band for an ugly woman who wore beatnik hats, and Paul McCartney turned down a $500 million offer in the 1990s to reunite the remaining Beatles for one night because he felt that it wouldn't be right without John, who broke up the band in the first place.
Paul was probably on acid at the time.
Which would also explain why he married a woman with a prosthetic foot.
All true.
:-)
Nevertheless, many of you disagreed with me completely, blindly declaring your love for the Beatles. A love -- I might add -- that will never be reciprocated, because John is dead, Paul has enough money to never have to sign another autograph, and ...
...well, to be honest, I can't remember who else was in the band. I'm sure they weren't important.
Anyways, my point is: It's only fair that your voice be heard. So:
From reader Tony Zayas:
To knock British bands is just wrong. Name a band, from ANY decade, that can stand up to the likes of Led Zeppelin, The Who, The Stones, Cream, Black Sabbath...I can go on for days, you get the point. And, I'll even answer it for you - No Such Band, Artist or Act exists. Plain and simple. Americans had Jimi Hendrix, who is my musical idol, but they didn't have much beyond The Experience. Certainly nothing that could touch what was coming out of Britain.
The 60's were great if for no other reason than the music. The 70's were forgettable if for no other reason than disco. The 80's were nothing more than laughable, if for no other reason than what all that blow did to our entire society for a decade.
Tony, you lost all credibility the second you called the 80s laughable. 80s music rocked!! I have two 80s CDs in my car. "Angel Is The Centerfold." "Video Killed The Radio Star." Phil Collins!! All much better artists and songs than the crap you mentioned. Black Sabbath. Good Lord.
Plus, it amazes me that you can bag on the 80s for drug use and yet worship The Rolling Stones, all with a straight face.
You must be a salesman. :-)
From reader Carlos:
You are such a close-minded valley boy jack@$$!
As Tony pointed out, the Beatles are an awesome band! Their musical talents of writing featured in Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band and the White Album are just two albums alone that show originality and talent!
In addition, the British are talented when it comes to music. Again as Tony stated, Rolling Stones, Who, among others are awesome!!!! Why do you think it was called the British Invasion!!!
Carlos, do you have an opinion that's actually yours? "As Tony pointed out." "As Tony stated." If Tony said that bridges would be better suited to hold cars if they were made out of straw, would you agree? Because Tony said so? If Tony said that people who gave themselves concussions are so totally cool, would you hit yourself over the head with a frying pan? Because Tony said so?
You two should share an apartment together. Then you can come back and tell me, "Tony says he always uses starch when doing laundry. I use starch too.
"Because Tony said so."
And finally, from my podcast partner Mike:
I'd agree with everything you said except the Beatle's songs sucking. I have yet to hear a thoughtful, musically educated person make that argument successfully.
Mike, you're fired.
No severance package.
And now for this week's:
SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE
A cheetah escaped from its cage on a Delta Airlines commercial flight and ran loose amongst the luggage. Eventually, experts ran onto the plane, shot the thing with tranquilizers, and took the cheetah back to the zoo.
If I was the head of Delta, I'd be furious.
I would've rather seen the cat killed, cooked and served to passengers for $25 a plate.
These are tough economic times, after all.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
3 comments:
Nevin,
Ok, here is my response.
First, I felt strongly to leave a comment since your thinking of the Beatles is so idiotic and flawed. Though, Tony already stated what I was thinking so why repeat it? It would be a waste of your time to read again what someone already wrote. Therefore, I left a statement to say that I agree with Tony showing where I stand on your pointless reasoning.
In Common law when cases are decided without the help of statutes, the judges use precedence meaning that the judge looks at cases (within their jurisdiction) that have been decided beforehand on similar facts and situations. Are you going to tell the judge or the jurisdictional system that "Ummm, my name is Nevin and you should decide a case or choose your argument/reasoning that is yours and not from others.... Ummm, I need to listen to Madonna right now...... Oh what's that song 'Like a Virgin'....."
JACK@$$!!!
Second, you want to criticize everyone's arguments, let's take a look at yours:
You hate the Beatles because:
1. They have dumb haircuts
2. Paul McCartney wouldn't do a show for 500 million
3. John Lennon broke up the band for an ugly woman
4. They were British.
As to point number 1, what does this have to do with music - I don't know... You say you liked 80s music, did you like a Flock of Seagles? They had dumb haircuts but their music was cool! Anyways, even though this doesn't have to do with music, let's look at the times. When the Beatles came out, this was the time of the clean-cut American with the clean-cut haircut and the "Leave it to Beaver" style. The band members had their bushy hair and eventually throughout time, had long hair. It was a sign of rebellion and the clean-cut society took it as that. It was an individuality statement, a sign that they weren't going to confirm! That is what the 60s rebellion brought - individuality and unconformity, which started alot of movements that we can be thankful about. As insignificant it is now and to the Valley, that hair style started a movement and a trend to some. If someone's hair can do that, WOW!!!! Give them props!
To statement 2, this has nothing to do with music but Paul McCartney was worth 300 million at the time of the offer. He doesn't need the money. What can he do with all that money if he did take it???? He already works with charity movements, animal right causes, etc. He doesn't need that money (even though we can use it :)). He performed for free in Israel recently to celebrate the anniversary of the country! Again, he is for causes and not for money since he has enough for his lifetime.
The fact that he turned down the offer to play is because you can't have the Beatles without John. To Paul, the band, the music and the members mean something to him since he started it and watched it turn into a legacy.
He knows as everyone else does there can't be the Beatles without John. It's like not having the jack@$$ in Nevin. One cannot go without the other.
There is more to life than money Nevin!
3. To point 3, ummm yeah, I will have to agree with you on that one. Anyone who argues that - eghhhh.... Good luck.... All I can say is that we all make mistakes :|.....
4. Finally, point 4, what is your point? They are British... Ok.... SOOOO???? You are from the Valley.... Good things happened in the Valley even though alot of people hate "valley people"... The movie Valley Girl came from here.... And..... Ummmm...... Yeah........ Anyways, they are British, yes but who cares...???
I do have American pride jack@$$... As mentioned in my comment before, alot of great music came from here - Leonard Skynard, Grand Funk Railroad, the Grunge scene, and many more!
I can see why you feel this way about British music The fact that you mentioned in your podcast recently that you have a Madonna song in your car shows me where your music taste lies... Have fun listening to Ryan Seacrest on KISS-FM tomorrow morning...
P.S. Are we on for dinner this coming week?
Wow, seriously carlos. How long did that comment take you to write? If this was a random Tuesday night I could understand, but you took 30 minutes of your Sunday to write all that? :)
BTW, you know everything Nev writes is tongue-in-cheek, right?
lol
This is Mike, your "former" podcast partner, writing in from work, so sorry about the anon.
I dunno, man. I think you're avoiding the issue here. You can hate the people, especially Paul, but the music is what matters, man, the music. That's where, I think, we all have issues with your argument. And by "we" I guess I don't mean Carlos. :)
Post a Comment