Saturday, March 6, 2010

DVR And Tivo: Changing Our Lives Forever: A Nevin Barich Blog Experience

Do you remember what your life was like before DVR and Tivo?

DVR. Tivo. Two words, incomprehensible not long ago, that are now a part of our everyday vocabulary. The ability not just to recover shows without the use of a VCR, but the power to a) record two shows at the the same time, b) record one show while watching another at the same time, or c) record two shows at the same time while simultaneously watching one of your recorded shows.

And that's not even getting into the ability to pause live TV, rewind it, fast forward it, manipulate and alter and control time in a way that no one thought possible.

Thanks to DVR and Tivo, we truly are the masters of our own universe.

As I write this, I'm currently recording the HBO special on Magic Johnson and Larry Bird, while at the same time recording boxing on Showtime, all while watching the horror film "Carrie" for the very first time (OK, I'm actually just watching the end of it. So let me get this straight: She becomes prom queen, someone dumps gunk on her, she kills everyone by looking at a hose, comes home to a house lighted with candles, washes the blood off in a bath, cries a bit, and then hears a speech from her mom telling her that the reason she's like this is because the mom had sex before marriage and thus "the devil has come home." What the hell? Oh, and now the mom stabs the daughter in the middle of a prayer. WTF?). I feel happy and light at heart, free of the shackles that came with having to pop a blank cassette tape into a VCR, not to mention the pressure of figuring out which speed to pick (which I never understood) and making sure that you're entering the right day and time.

With DVR and Tivo, the work is done for you. You don't have to worry about anything. You just come home and all of your favorite shows are there waiting, right inside your TV.

You know what DVR is like? Having a maid. Instead of the stress of cleaning your home yourself, you can leave in the morning, come home after work, and find everything spotless. It's effortless. DVR is the same thing. You come home, and it's all done for you. All that's missing is a home-cooked meal on the table.

But there is a concern here. We're getting spoiled. Lately I've been hearing radio ads about "the perils of only being able to record two shows at once." I've heard friends bitch and moan about how hard life is becoming because three of their favorite shows are on at 8 p.m. on Mondays and so they have to eliminate one. It's like hearing someone who three years ago was driving a Pinto and was just happy to have a car that got from Point A to Point B, now complaining that the leather seats in the 2010 BMWs are not up to their suddenly exacting standards, and so they need to spend thousands more on the 2011 model.

So now people are flocking to electronics stores with devices that allow them to record four shows at once. I mean, dude: How much more do you need? Me me me. Now now now. More more more. Enough already. You can record two shows at once. Be happy with that.

Remember:

In certain parts of the world, they still have VCRs.

:-)

And now for this week's:

SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE

The NBA's New Jersey Nets, which is the worst team in pro basketball this season, is trying to counter their dwindling attendance in various ways.

The latest promotion: New Jersey residents 18 or older who attended a recent game got a coupon that they could redeem at a Roni Deutch Tax Center to get their state income tax done free.

To be fair: The Nets did draw 2,000 more fans than usual on free tax preparation night. Still, I like the Lakers' free taco promotion better.

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