Saturday, September 27, 2008

Raising The Price Of Double Cheeseburgers: How The Failing U.S. Economy Affects Me: A Nevin Barich Blog Experience

In case you haven't heard, the U.S. economy is coming apart at the seems. The U.S. housing market is collapsing. Retail stores are struggling. Washington Mutual failed.

None of these things affect me in the slightest. I don't own a house, I'm not planning to buy a store, and even though I'm a WaMu customer, JPMorgan buying them out means all that will change is the name of the bank on my accounts.

But that's not to say the sad state of the economy hasn't left me unscathed. Quite the opposite. The struggles around us have touched my circle of existence. And it's done so in a very personal way.

Because of the recent failures of the U.S. economy...

McDonald's might raise the price of their $1 double cheeseburger to $1.29.

Truly a dark day indeed.

I've seen many cheap burgers come and go during my 29 years on Earth. The Burger King Whopper was $1 for so long that I, like many Americans, assumed that was always the regular price. Today, the Whopper goes for $2.69 (extra charge for cheese).

When the price of the Whopper was raised, Carl's Jr.'s Famous Star filled the void, selling its goodness for a mere 99 cents. Today, this sandwich goes for $1.99 (extra charge for cheese).

And when the Famous Star went uptown, there was McDonald's, ready to fill the void. Willing to say, "We understand. We feel your pain and we're here for you. Here's a $1 double cheeseburger. It's not as big as the Whopper or Famous Star, but we won't charge you for cheese. Do good by us and we'll do good by you."

And now, "do good by you" is threatening to go up to $1.29, claiming economic poverty.

Now you may ask: "Nev, what's the big deal? It's only an extra 29 cents. What damages could that possibly cause?"

To which I say the following:

It is that way of thinking that has doomed us throughout history.

It is that way of thinking that was used when deciding not to stop Hitler in Poland. It was that way of thinking that was used when deciding not to go after Saddam Hussein in 1991. Mike Tyson roaming free. Osama bin Laden in caves. New Coke. All caused by the idea of, "What harm could possibly come of this?"

If the McDonald's $1 double cheeseburger gets raised to $1.29, do you think that will be the end? No. Soon after, it will go up to $1.50. Then $1.75. Then $1.99. And before you know it, that delectable treat that you enjoyed for a mere buck has more than doubled in price.

And that's when you'll ask yourself: "Why didn't someone do something sooner?"

The housing market is collapsing? Fine.

Retail stores are struggling? Who cares?

WaMu is no more? I don't have enough money to risk losing it.

But raising the price of double cheeseburgers?

That hits home.

And now for this week's:

SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE

A Nebraska man abandoned nine of 10 children at a hospital under the state's "safe haven" law, which allows parents or caregivers to leave children at state-certified hospitals without fear of prosecution.

The law was passed with the intention of protecting infants, and lawmakers are apparently "shocked" that parents of older kids are taking advantage.

Now there's talk of amending the law.

I have two suggestions:

1) Don't allow any more Nebraskans to have children. Make it a felony, punishable by death.

Or 2) Make it legal to shoot unwanted children without fear of prosecution.

I'm cool with either one.

7 comments:

Dave said...

Hi Nev, it's Dave.
Minette asked me to tell you that this week's Sign of the Apocalypse cracked her up.

As it involved euthaniasia, I'm vaguely worried about this. But I have delivered my message, my work is done.

Minette also sympathizes with your cheeseburger position, though she no longer eats at McDonald's.

Dave said...

Oops, I spelled "euthanasia" wrong. Sorry.

Anonymous said...

GET A LIFE!!!!!


P.S. USC lost to a non-ranking team!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Prince Gomolvilas said...

Yeah, take that USC!

(I don't actually know what this is referring to, but it sound like it hurts you. And that's what I want to do. Hurt you.)

Anonymous said...

as i eat cheeseburgers once a year i'm not too involved but you are right people who do not take a stand are .... are.... probably.................seated.

Ramona said...

I agree. There really is nothing like a good, greasy, processed cheesy double cheeseburger.

Let's hope McDonalds blinks first, under the immense pressure all your faithful readers will now thrust on their corporate offices.

But dont despair. The good folks at Wendy's, Carl's Jr., Taco Bell and Del Taco called to remind you that they offer many delectable, grease-soaked, deep-fried fast food options for under a dollar.

Now if Carls jacks up the Spicy Chicken Sandwich, we know there's a real problem.

Elly said...

Next, they’ll be charging extra for the pickles! Utter insanity I tell you!